Bad night

I had a terrible night, last night.  I could not settle.  The room is too hot.  I have a fever.  I open all the blinds to allow any air into the room, but of course the air is still.  I get no breeze.  I try to turn on my fan (usually used to dry wet beds!!) and discover that it isn't working.  I have no moving air.

I try various things to help me sleep eg reading my book, lying with my eyes closed, reading the paper (Andy Murray - I am weeping with glee).  Nothing works.  I give up and tidy up the top of my chest of drawers.  I put my running medals on two sides of a Renne Magritte poster - the one of two faces kissing:  the faces are covered with greyish cloths.  I empty my make up drawer of drugs.  It is half full of various solutions to my "depression" , for example, vitamins, ibuprofen, paracetemol, and Katy's asthma inhalers, eye drops, eye patches even.  I had a genuine eye injury a few years ago, where I scratched my cornea and was literally blinded in one eye for weeks. 

After this, I lie down and close my eyes for sleep.

I do sleep.  However, I have the most awful nightmare.  I dream that I am in a house, and that I fall over flat onto my face.  I am aware that my family are behind me - my mum, my two sisters and my brother.  I am in agony, and I cannot believe that they are not coming to help me.  I am trying to shout, but cannot call out.  The noises I am making are grunts and moans and no words emerge.  I eventually wake myself when I have built myself up to shout "MUM!".  My mum is at my side. 

After this, I do fall asleep.  I sleep properly and wake at 6am ready for next round of drugs.

I phone my sister, Max who is always up bright and early.   We have a good chat.  Thanks Max.